The Misadventures of José Faxner

Hey everyone, and happy new year! I meant to write something sooner, but as usual I got sidetracked and for whatever reason couldn’t be bothered until now. I don’t usually bother with new years’ resolutions, but in a weak moment I considered starting the practice off with a bang, with a promise to write something on this site every day. Needless to say, this isn’t exactly a great start!

I’m still kind of on the fence as to whether I want to give it a try or not. I mean, on one hand I really want to keep this site better updated, and there really is no shortage of stuff to write about - as mundane as my life is things DO happen between updates, and for the times when they don’t, well, I’ve always got a good rant or two up my sleeve. But on the other hand, I’m pretty lazy, and I have the attention span of a 3-year old when it comes to this sort of thing.

I dunno though, I guess it could become a good exercise in discipline. It’s not like I don’t enjoy writing for the site, so I’m not really sure why I keep dreading it the way I do. I guess that’s my attention span for ya. Well, that and my bad habit of tackling pressure and expectations by putting off (if not completely ignoring) my responsibilities. :S

I guess my updates are more frequent and regular now than they ever were before, but that doesn’t really matter to me. I still feel like there’s so much I never write about, and I still spend alot of my time going around forming hypothetical blog posts in my head instead of writing actual ones, and as long as that stuff is going on, I guess I’m not really going to be very satisfied with the way I’m running this site.

I don’t want to make a big deal about it - I’m feeling enough like the boy who cried wolf as it is - but I do want to write more regularly, as well as write about more stuff. I mean, there’s only so much you can write about laying on the couch waiting for your welfare check, but as anyone who regularly chats with me on IRC or MSN can attest to, there’s a lot more I can talk about than that. In some circles I’m even infamous for my soapbox shenanigans, so it does seem a bit silly that now that I do have a grand stage set up for myself, I’m hardly using it. I guess I’ve always had kind of a fear of alienating my readership (all two of you) with incredibly nerdy stuff no one cares about, but it’s hardly as if infrequent updates on my private life is really going to take the internet by storm either. Besides, this whole site is MY thing anyway, so it would just be kind of silly to water things down to some kind of arbitrarily assigned lowest common denominator.

In fact I’m sure that’s one of the reasons updates haven’t been as frequent as they could’ve been; on some level I limit myself to stuff I feel I should write about as opposed to stuff I want to write about. That’s not to say that I don’t enjoy the stuff I’m doing now, or that I’m not writing about any nerdy stuff that would have a limited audience… but I think that’s the key word right there, audience. Needless to say, I want people to read my blog, or writing it would be somewhat pointless, but I think it’s surpassed by the pointlessness of conforming to an audience that I don’t even know exists. So from here on out, I guess I’ll try to ease up on the self-censorship, and see how that works out. Hey, if I’m lucky I might even GAIN some readers.

PS. My camera died, hence the delay of christmas photos. Once I get batteries for it I’ll upload some pictures.

PPS. You were totally right, Joe, I think way too much.